Too Late For Words
by Hitokiri Firefly
Summary: A "novelisation" of Chidori's death scene. Written from Yuuhi's point of view. Be warned, there are MAJOR spoilers, from start to finish. (note:this is a sad fic)


:: TOO LATE FOR WORDS ::

  
  
TOO LATE FOR WORDS ~ AN AYASHI NO CERES FANFIC  
written by hitokiri firefly-sama  
  
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Disclaimers : The powers that be did not think me worthy and so Ayashi no Ceres and all its characters do not belong to me. They belong to Yuu Watase and all related companies. I'm just exercising my right as a deranged otaku to write horrible fanfics about awesome animes, so please don't sue me. 

Before we get to the fic itself, let me say I love Ayashi no Ceres : so many lovely angst and emotions to play around with ^^. Perhaps that why I'm writing this fic; be warned, here there are angst, so for those who somehow have a low tolerance for incessant mental blabbering and lengthy descriptions, please stay away. Of course, if you're an anime lover, or better yet, an Ayashi no Ceres lover, you would appreciate all the angst, but I'm digressing now, ain't I?

The following fic is actually a "novelisation" of sorts (anyone with a better term please tell me!), of the scene where Yuuhi carries Chidori to escape the Kagami building by way of the sewers. If you haven't watched that particular episode yet, just know that major spoilers await.

More notes and comments at the end of the fanfic. Please be gentle with your reviews, okay? Onegai shimasu!

Now, on with the fic! *drum roll*.

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TOO LATE FOR WORDS ~ a vignette

Sounds of gunshot resounded through the corridor and echoed along the dark hallways in front of him. A frantic search revealed no wounds as Aogiri Yuuhi quickly scanned the limp girl in his arms. A sigh of relief escaped his chapped lips and he wrapped his arm tighter around the girl's waist.

Leading her deeper into the darkened hallway, Yuuhi slowly laid her down on the floor. "Rest here for a while," he whispered, careful not to raise his voice lest it be heard by Kagami's men who were currently running around searching for them, armed with firepower he thought only were legal in the movies. 

Kuruma Chidori winced as he let her go, and she rested her head against the smooth concrete wall. Taking a seat beside her, Yuuhi laid a tired hand over his eyes, trying to take in deep breaths as his chest heaved up and down. Taking off the bullet-proof vest which hampered much of his movements, his eyes closed as his mind replayed the events that happened earlier. 

God...how did things go bad so fast?

From the beginning he had known of how serious this mission was, how his martial arts weren't going to be enough to save him if he were caught. He had only thought of Chidori, and while they were on the boat speeding towards the Kagami building, he had remembered thinking about how worried he was about the girl's well-being. That, and the fact that Kagami had her little brother, Shouta locked up as well made him a nervous wreck by the time they pulled up in front of the sewers that would lead him inside Kagami's building. Of course, he also tried very hard not to show his anxiety in front of Touya, who seemed calm and did not seem a bit fazed as he handed Yuuhi a gun swiped from a fallen operative. Yuuhi remembered how he had taken the gun as calmly as he could get himself to be, and his ears heard but not necessarily listened to Touya's instructions. One word kept repeating in his mind, no matter how hard he tried to stop it.

_Chidori._

He had found her in one of the hospital-like wards, with various tubes running out of her arms and tons of monitors flanking her bed. How relieved he had felt then as he wrapped his hand around hers. Chidori had opened her eyes slowly, as though it was taking a lot out of her, and a warm feeling spread throughout his body as his eyes took in the weak smile she tried to give to him. 

"Yuuhi-kun,"

Yuuhi abruptly came back to his present situation, and his eyes darted over to the girl beside him. Her face was pale, and the violet hair matted to her forehead only accentuated the pair of amber eyes which were currently looking at him. Yuuhi checked himself and blinked to pull himself together. 

"What is it?" he asked, a bit puzzled by the satisfied look she gave him.

"It's nothing," she said softly, clasping her hands on her lap. "It's just..." her voice trailed away as she smiled again, "I just feel so happy that you came for me...Yuuhi-kun,"

Yuuhi found himself chuckling, amazed at how she would think that he would abandon her at the time she needs his help the most. "What are you talking about? Of course I'd come and save you. No way I'd let Kagami and his band of scientists keep you locked up like that."

Chidori shook her head. "I just feel happy that you felt I was worthy of your help, Yuuhi-kun," Slowly, she eased herself nearer to him and laid her head on his shoulder. "Let me stay like this, for a while. I hope you don't mind."

Mind? Of course he doesn't!

But common sense told him that staying around much longer would spell disaster for the whole mission. He let the girl lean on him for a while longer, finding that he himself was enjoying Chidori's soft form beside him. Reluctantly, he squeezed her hand and pushed her away.

"Come on, let's go. We gotta get outta here," he said, annoyed that his suddenly husky voice was obvious to Chidori, and that she was amused by his uneasiness around her. Gently, he pulled her to her feet, and wrapped an arm around her waist to steady her.

Smiling, Chidori pulled him into an embrace, resting her face against his neck. Yuuhi felt himself blushing. 

"O-oi! What do you think you're doing?" Yuuhi said, his senses tingling from the various places she unknowingly touched him. "We've gotta get a move on, or else--"

"Just a bit longer," she whispered, and Yuuhi couldn't say anything but let the girl have her way.

In the weeks that followed, Yuuhi would replay this moment over and over again in his mind, wondering how in hell he had allowed his guard down and his senses relax to not have been able to detect the danger that would soon come their way. He would wonder and wonder, but Yuuhi would not know of the answer, except for the fact that when she had held him, there was nothing else he thought of, besides her thin body against him or the fact that he had wanted to return her embrace.

"Yuuhi-kun, I--"

Chidori didn't manage to finish her sentence, and he could hear her gasp and felt her hands gripping his arms. In a move too quick for him to register, he was turned around and thrown to the floor, falling backwards and away from Chidori who had a desperate expression on her face.

"Chidori..." 

A gunshot and Yuuhi landed, hitting his head against the cold floor.

"Chidori..."

Her face twisted into an expression of pure agony, and blood spurted forth from her chest and she fell forward, her fall broken as she landed none too softly on top of him. As if he was watching everything in slow-motion, his dazed eyes watched the careless flutter of her hair and how some of it covered his own face when she landed on him. His eyes were wide, unblinking, and he didn't move for fear of inflicting more damage upon the girl who was motionless above him.

Gunshot and blood. Only then did Yuuhi truly realise what had just happened. 

_Chidori..._

An unfamiliar feeling welled up within him, and along with his newfound anger he felt a grief that was too painful for him to bear. Unbidden, the tears slipped from the corners of his eyes and rolled down his cheeks.

Pushing the girl away from him, Yuuhi stood, the anger that he felt reflected in his eyes. Within the blink of an eye he had a gun aimed at the attacker's head, his forefinger ready on the trigger.

"Why...?" he said, his voice coming out choked and pained. Pressing the gun harder against wrinkled forehead, Yuuhi demanded. "Why did you have to shoot?!"

The man had tears of his own staining his face, a sad sight since he had been bold enough to pull the trigger and shoot an unarmed girl. Yuuhi's demands made the man fall down to his knees, and as Yuuhi prodded, he lay prone on the ground as Yuuhi continued to aim the gun at his head.

"WHY?!" Yuuhi sobbed, unable to control the flow of tears. "WHY DID YOU HAVE TO SHOOT?!"

The sobbing man beneath him did nothing to push Yuuhi away. By that small fact Yuuhi felt disgust for the man and unimaginable pity at the person who had shot a girl and yet was cowering underneath his own gun. 

"You're r-running away w-with t-the p-patient..." the man mumbled, his eyes wide and not noticing the puddle of saliva collecting around his mouth. "Y-you can't l-leave--"

"ENOUGH!!" Yuuhi screamed, and the finger on the trigger moved.

"No, Yuuhi-kun!" Chidori screamed from behind him. Gasping, Yuuhi let go of the trigger, then turned around slowly. His vision blurred with more tears as he saw Chidori on her side, trying with all her might to reach to him. She was crying as well. "No...Yuuhi-kun...please..."

_You are not that type of person...Yuuhi-kun..._

Chidori had reverted back to her normal body. The violet hair and amber eyes were gone, and in their places were the long brown hair and eyes that he now knows that he had always admired. 

He quickly ran to her side, and groaned when he saw the gunshot wound. Motioning for her to lean on to him, he carried her on his back, throwing the gun behind him.

No way was he gonna let her die from this. Not when he'd come this far. 

When he had first landed with Touya at the pier, the walk towards the basement of the Kagami building did not take long, or rather, did not **feel** long, as his mind was preoccupied and all he could think about was getting to Chidori and her brother and then getting them all out of the place. But now, when he was alone with only a wounded girl on his back, it seemed to him as if it would take forever for him to reach the meeting point. Tightening his hold on Chidori, he forced himself to be optimistic about the whole situation.

_Dammitdammitdammitdammit...how'd I get so careless?_

"Just a bit more," Yuuhi said, his cheery tone masking the pain he felt in his heart. "Pretty soon we'll be out of these tunnels and then we'll be outta here."

He felt Chidori's warm breath against his neck. He also noticed how weak it had felt. 

"Ne, Yuuhi-kun..." she whispered, her cheek against his shoulder.

"What is it?"

"I--" Chidori paused before continuing. "I suddenly feel like I want to eat some of your cooking now."

Yuuhi chuckled, though it sounded forced. "Oh really? Then what do you want me to cook for you?"

"Anything...anything that you like..."

"All right then. I'll make barbequed fish and I'll make 'em everyday too."

Chidori sighed and wrapped her arms around his shoulders tighter.

Yuuhi felt compelled to continue speaking. "In fact, I'll think I'll cook everyday for you, and for Shouta as well," He paused as he readjusted his hold on Chidori. "You and Shouta can go to school in Tokyo, and you can go on with your lives just like before."

Chidori was silent, but Yuuhi could still feel her breaths against his neck. 

After a while, she spoke again. "Yuuhi-kun..."

"What's wrong?"

He felt her shiver slightly. A small demon of panic began to tug at his mind, but he told himself to focus. "I--I feel so very cold..."

_No...hang on, Chidori..._

"...but the back of Yuuhi-kun...is very warm..." she whispered.

He did not know what else to say. In a low voice, he said, "You have to hold on, Chidori."

"I--It's better for you, isn't it?" Chidori asked, her voice growing weaker. Yuuhi did not want her to over-exert herself but found himself listening instead. "It's better if I hold on to the /tennyo/ form, right? ...Y-you prefer older girls...not a kid like me..."

"What are you saying? You're not a kid, Chidori. All I know is that you are one of the most beautiful and matured girls I ever know," Yuuhi said, smiling slightly in the darkness. But it was one smile that Chidori never saw.

He felt her snuggle against his back. "Yuuhi-kun..."

"You've always been..."

Yuuhi waited a while, but Chidori did not continue. He stopped in his tracks, feeling the demon of panic within him grow to massive proportions that threatened to erupt in one big hysteria.

"O-oi, Chidori," he said, nudging the girl none too gently with his fingers. "You didn't finish your sentence...ne...Chidori..."

But the girl wouldn't answer him. She had said her last words forever, had taken her last breath and had smiled her last smile. Yuuhi felt the tears well up again, his disgust at his own self dominating his grief.

"No..." he whispered, still holding on to Chidori. The denial would rip him apart but he didn't care. "No..."

The tears flowing freely down his cheeks, he turned his face upwards, noticing that they had reached the pier.

But what good could that do now?

The pain in his heart multiplied and he let his emotions be heard and his anger be acknowledged by the heavens.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~

Epilogue

The night was cold, but colder still was the death he held in his arms. The tears were gone, but the ache remained still. Chidori was dead, and with her she had taken away his heart.

Beside him, his older brother touched him lightly on the arm. "We have to leave."

He heard his brother, and even snapped about how they were not leaving until everyone had safely returned, but his mind was focused on the girl he held on his lap. He thought he was through with crying but as he ran a trembling finger down her cheek he felt those tears again at the corners of his eyes. Blinking them away so as not to break down in front of the men beside him, he told himself to get a grip.

_Chidori...why...you don't deserve this..._

Yuuhi had never led an easy life but even then things were never as difficult as now. His life was literally turned upside down as the Aogiri House somehow became the unofficial hotel for stray /tennyos/. 

_Why did you have to go away?_

Kuruma Chidori, the girl who physically was ten years younger than him, but mentally was just the same age as he was. Kuruma Chidori, who had came into his life uninvited and unwelcomed. Kuruma Chidori, who had pigged off his cooking and had always teased him about the difference in their ages.

Kuruma Chidori, the girl who had somehow captured his heart, and had held tight on to it even as she drew her last breath and had closed her eyes forever.

Clenching his eyes shut, Yuuhi fought the sudden wave of nausea. He realised that he had so many things to say, so many things to tell. This was a familiar feeling to him, as he had felt the same way when his mother had left him as a child, ignoring his cries as he had pleaded to her to not leave him.

But she left him anyway... both of them. And for the second time in his life, Yuuhi felt so alone.

He would never love again...ever.

~OWARI~

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~@~ AUTHOR'S NOTES AND RAMBLINGS ~@~

I admit, this "novelisation" can not be considered as a fanfic, nor can it be considered an original work, but I'd like to think that my style of writing is original. There are some instances in the story where it does not fit with the original scene, but I can't remember all that well (I watched the series about 3 weeks ago), so please forgive me. Comments and criticism are welcomed, and as with any questions that you might have about this story.

I know I'm probably gonna get flames for the Yuuhi-Chidori pairing, but before any of you get really psycho on me, I wanna say that I actually like the Yuuhi-Aya pairing to a greater extent ^^. At the same time I also like the Yuuhi-Chidori pairing, and since she died and all I figured there was no harm in giving Chidori this one fic. Chidori was really cute (IMO), but the fact that she's still just a kid kinda puts me off, I guess. Besides, Yuuhi is OBVIOUSLY in love with Aya...Chidori's just there because, she's there.

And I KNOW that I'm gonna be flamed for that ^^;;.

With that said, thanks for reading!

Yours truly,  
The Hitokiri Firefly (formerly known as Earth Firefly)  
Visit my anime/kenshin site, :: Ookina Yume :: at  
http://www.geocities.com/shairil_firefly  
or mail me at shairil_firefly@yahoo.com

What does everyone seek by fighting?  
Does spilled blood cause flowers to bloom?  
Until the precious tomorrow is in my hands...  
I wander the seemingly dark future... -- Kiseki no Umi 


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